The Balance of Midwifery

When families choose homebirth midwifery care, they often see the visible aspects of our work—the prenatal visits where we take time to answer every question, the calm presence during labor, the gentle postpartum care. What remains largely unseen is the profound commitment that extends far beyond those visible hours.

The Invisible Hours

For each client I serve, I commit approximately 600-1000 hours on call. These aren't billable hours—they're the hours where my life is arranged around the possibility of your labor beginning. They're the family gatherings I attend with two cars, just in case. They're the weekend trips canceled because they would take me more than an hour from your home. They're the nights I sleep with my phone turned up loud, my birth bag packed and ready by the door.

Every night when I'm on call for a mother, my last thought before sleep is of her and her baby. Is she feeling those first sensations of labor? Will her water break in the middle of the night? Will tonight be the night I receive that call saying, "I think it's time"?

The Heart Work

Midwifery care is intimate by design. We spend 12-15 hours together during prenatal care before your birth ever begins, building the trust and relationship that makes birth sacred and safe. But beyond those hours are countless more spent in prayer over your baby and your birth, reviewing your charts and labs, researching the best approaches for your unique situation, and wondering if I've provided enough information about everything from kick counts to postpartum recovery.

I answer texts and calls at all hours—even when my family gives me "the look" for checking my phone during dinner. Because I know that for you, the question feels urgent, even if it's simply wondering if those new sensations are normal.

The Weight We Carry

As a midwife I have breathed life into a babies lungs. I have desperately prayed while using every skill taught to me to help stop a mother's bleeding. I have made split-second decisions in moments where seconds matter.

This isn't shared to cause fear—birth is beautifully and wonderfully designed to work. But it's shared to illuminate that midwifery is both beautiful work and a heavy weight to carry. We hold the space where new life enters, where families are transformed, where mothers discover strength they never knew they possessed.

The Sacred Balance

The midwifery model of care stands in contrast to the medical model because it recognizes birth as a normal life process while remaining vigilant for the moments that require intervention. Finding this balance—honoring the physiologic process while being prepared for emergencies—is the art at the heart of midwifery.

At Full Well Midwifery, this balance is my commitment to you. It's why I only take 1-2 clients per month, ensuring I can dedicate myself fully to each family's journey. It's why we spend so much time together before birth—building the relationship that will guide us through even the most challenging moments with shared decision-making and mutual trust.

The weight of midwifery is one I carry willingly, even joyfully, because I believe deeply in empowering women and families to make informed decisions about their bodies, their births, and their babies. It's a calling to witness and protect the sacred space where families are born.

Heather is a licensed midwife serving the greater Roanoke area, including Botetourt County, Montgomery County, the NRV, Bedford, Lexington, and Covington. To learn more about midwifery care or to schedule a consultation, contact us today.

I am a home birth midwife, but I was not equipped for doula work.

As a home birth midwife who began her journey directly in out-of-hospital birth rather than the more common path through doula work, my understanding of birth was shaped by something profound and primal. I learned birth in spaces where informed consent wasn't just a form to sign, but an ongoing dialogue. Where every touch was preceded by a “Is it ok if I touch you?”, every intervention discussed with care and respect.

In home birth, I witnessed birth in its raw power – mothers roaring their babies earthside into their partners' waiting hands. I saw women treated like queens, tenderly fed warm soup as they nursed their newborns, basking in the oxytocin haze of those first precious hours. We created sacred spaces: intimate, dark, quiet sanctuaries where birth could unfold naturally, with minimal interruption. These mothers emerged from labor victorious, reborn into motherhood.

Then I began attending hospital births as a doula during my apprenticeship to help financially support my family, and my heart shattered.

I remember sitting in my car after one particular birth, sobbing to my preceptor. The mother wasn't traumatized – she had what she considered a good experience, because it was all she knew. But I witnessed something else: hands reaching inside her body without permission, stretching her open during pushing even as she asked them to stop. She was told she had to lay on her back, ordered out of the comfort of warm water to push. Eleven strangers moved through the room under harsh fluorescent lights as she labored. Her legs were placed in stirrups, her dignity stripped away as gloved hands pulled on her baby's head instead of waiting for the natural restitution of birth.

They called it a "normal spontaneous vaginal birth" in the American medical system, but there was nothing normal about it to me. She wasn't celebrated as the warrior she was. She wasn't empowered in her strength. Instead, she was handed a six-week checkup appointment and discharged within 24 hours – none of the intensive postpartum care and breastfeeding support that we know mothers deserve.

I had to stop taking doula clients. The weight of grief became too heavy to bear – mourning for experiences these mothers didn't even know were being stolen from them. I wept for the births they could have had, for the ancient wisdom of generations reduced to a medical procedure managed by strangers.

My heart aches that I couldn't continue supporting women in hospital settings, and I hold deep gratitude for the doulas who do this vital work. But birth trauma isn't just about the mothers – it affects all of us who witness this sacred rite of passage being diminished. It was a trauma I couldn't reconcile or move past.

Some might say I abandoned these mothers by stepping away. But sometimes, acknowledging our limits isn't weakness – it's wisdom. And perhaps by sharing this truth, we can begin to imagine a different way forward, where every birth honors both the physical and spiritual journey of bringing new life into the world. I still try to pour into the hospital birthing community through childbirth education, but my in hospital experiences are limited to times when my midwifery clients need to birth in the hospital setting.

Let me be clear: there are incredible providers in hospital settings who understand and protect the sacred space of birth. I've witnessed beautiful, empowering hospital births where mothers were respected, supported, and celebrated. When medical interventions are truly needed, I'm profoundly grateful for the lifesaving care our hospital system provides my clients. But treating every physiologic birth as a medical event – managing, controlling, and intervening in a process that women's bodies inherently understand – robs mothers of something fundamental to their power and humanity.

Choosing a Midwife for your Home Birth and Pregnancy

Choosing Your Midwife: A Guide to Finding Your Perfect Birth Partner

At Full Well Midwifery, we believe that selecting your midwife is one of the most important decisions you'll make during your pregnancy journey. This relationship goes far beyond clinical care – it's a partnership that will support you through one of life's most transformative experiences. Here's our comprehensive guide to helping you find the right midwife for your birth journey.

-Understanding the Foundations of Midwifery Care

The practice of midwifery beautifully blends ancient wisdom with modern medical knowledge. A skilled midwife should offer both the traditional arts of birthing support and the safety measures that contemporary healthcare provides. This balanced approach ensures you receive the most comprehensive care possible.

-Essential Questions to Ask During Your Search

-Education and Clinical Experience

Your midwife's background forms the foundation of safe practice. Consider asking:

* What formal education and certifications do they hold?

* How long have they been practicing independently?

* How many births have they attended as primary midwife?

* What is their experience with specific situations like:

* Previous VBAC’s

* Breech presentations

* Twin pregnancies

* Water births

* How do they stay current with continuing education?

-Holistic Care Approach

A well-rounded midwife integrates various aspects of wellness into their care model:

* What is their philosophy on nutrition and lifestyle during pregnancy?

* Do they have knowledge of herbal medicine and natural remedies?

* How do they support emotional and spiritual well-being?

* What comfort measures and positioning techniques do they use during labor?

* How do they view the mind-body connection in birth?

-Safety Protocols and Emergency Preparedness

Understanding your midwife's approach to safety is crucial:

* What medical equipment do they bring to births?

* Which emergency medications do they carry?

* What is their transport rate to hospitals?

* Can they share examples of when they've needed to transfer care?

* What are their relationships like with local medical facilities?

* Do they have specific protocols for common emergencies?

-Practice Style and Availability

The logistics of care matter greatly:

* How many clients do they accept per month?

* What is their on-call schedule?

* Do they work with a backup midwife? What would happen if two clients were in labor at one time.

* How long are typical prenatal visits?

* What does postpartum care include?

* How do they handle after-hours questions or concerns?

-Communication and Relationship Building

Your comfort with your midwife's communication style is essential:

* How do they involve partners and family members?

* What is their approach to birth planning?

* How do they handle disagreements about care decisions?

* What is their philosophy on informed consent?

* How accessible are they between appointments? How do they communicate with clients?

-Red Flags to Watch For

While every practice is different, be cautious if you encounter:

* Reluctance to discuss transport rates or complications

* Dismissal of your questions or concerns

* Inflexibility with birth preferences

* Lack of clear protocols for emergencies

* Poor communication or delayed responses

* Unwillingness to provide references

-Making Your Decision

Trust your instincts when choosing your midwife. Beyond their qualifications and experience, you should feel:

* Heard and respected during every interaction

* Confident in their clinical skills

* Comfortable asking questions

* Supported in your choices

* Safe in their care

Remember that this relationship will span several months and one of the most intimate experiences of your life. Take time to find someone who not only meets your clinical needs but also resonates with your personal philosophy about birth and wellness.

- Our Approach at Full Well Midwifery

We believe in transparent, comprehensive care that honors both the art and science of midwifery. During your complimentary consultation, we'll be happy to discuss any of these points in detail and share how our practice approaches each aspect of care.

Ready to learn more about our midwifery services? Contact us to schedule your initial consultation and begin your journey toward a supported, empowered birth experience.

You can schedule your free consult here fullwellmidwifery.as.me